From Chapter Thirteen
The Fall of a Gambler, the Rise of a Host
The epidemiology of problem gambling is in its infancy. The American Psychiatric Association didn't define pathological gambling as a mental-health disorder until 1980. And as late as 1990, the Americans with Disabilities Act, aimed at prohibiting discrimination against people with disabling illnesses, excluded gamblers. Compulsive gambling became a bona fide public-health issue only in the late '90s; the fourth annual conference on problem gambling was held in Las Vegas in late 2003.
In 1998, the Nevada Gaming Control Board mandated that casinos had to prominently post problem-gambling hotline phone numbers, along with brochures about getting help for problem gambling. "When the Fun Stops" is the headline on one of the small flyers that sit in racks near the cage. One of Cyr's gamblers picked it up once when he was cashing out $80,000 in winnings. During dinner, he regaled some friends with his responses to the questions posed in the brochure, designed to identify a gambling
problem.
Have you ever lied to your loved ones about going to Las Vegas? "Only every second or third time I come here."
Do you sometimes neglect your family because of gambling? "Yup. I take excellent care of my family ninety-five percent
of the time. The other five percent, when I'm in Las Vegas, I completely, totally, and without guilt neglect them."
Have you ever borrowed money to gamble? "Of course! Isn't that the definition of a casino credit line?"
Have you ever lied about the amount you've lost? "Every time. What gambler in his right mind would tell his wife, banker,
boss, customers, or even close friends how much he really loses?"
Have you ever gambled more money in an attempt to win back losses? "Only every time I sign a marker."
And the best one: Do you gamble to escape worry? "I run a huge corporation. I have a thousand employees. Every one
of them fucks up somehow every day. Half of the fuck-ups wind up on my desk. The big half. When I get home, my wife's
pissed off over something and my kids are out of control. I'm always being hit up for loans. I've got the insider-trading police
shining flashlights up my asshole. Of course, they can't see anything, because I'm always so fuckin' constipated. I drink ten
cups of coffee a day to keep me going. I take sleeping pills to crash.
"I come to Vegas every three months. I fly here in the casino's jet. I have dinner with my friends. I get to see Bruce
Springsteen on the house. Once in a while I cash out eighty thousand. When the fun stops? Are you shittin' me? If it wasn't
for gambling and Las Vegas, I'd blow my fuckin' head off."
From Chapter Fifteen
High-Rolling Tycoons, Superstars, and Women
Of all the Las Vegas high-roller events Steve Cyr has planned, hosted, or attended, two have surprised him.
One was during the World Wrestling Federation road show. He never, in a million years, expected any of his players
to want to attend a WWF (now WWE) performance. He didn't even buy tickets. But all of a sudden, customers were calling
and clamoring to get in. He managed to handle most of them, but his secretary, Tina Jones, had to run down to the arena
with cash to buy the rest from scalpers.
The other was Howard Stern.
Stern has made four public appearances at Las Vegas' Hard Rock over Super Bowl weekends 2001 and 2002, in
April 2003, and in May 2004. It's rumored that he received more than a million dollars from the Hard Rock for each
appearance.
Cyr couldn't believe his eyes on the shock jock's first visit. He wasn't able to park within a half-mile of the casino.
People began lining up 24 hours before Stern's arrival so they could get in. At one point, security guards had to lock the
Hard Rock doors when the size of the crowd exceeded the fire- code limit. That only happens on New Year's Eve. Forget
the Rolling Stones. Forget Barbra Streisand. Forget New Year's Eve! Howard Stern could be the current biggest draw in
Las Vegas. Especially for the Hard Rock crowd.
During his first three appearances, Stern sponsored a $100,000 hand of blackjack. The proceeds of the bet, if it
won, were promised to the winner of a contest to find the sorriest hard-luck story among listeners. The Hard Rock agreed
to book the bet -- Hard Rock versus Hard Luck.
The first year, a dealt 19 stood up against the dealer's draw to 18 and Hard Luck won the cash. The second year,
Hard Rock got its revenge when Hard Luck hit and busted a 15 against a dealer 10. The third year, Hard Luck was dealt
a 16. The dealer turned up a 10. Hard Luck was a big dog. But according to basic strategy, the better play is to hit. It's
not better by much -- the difference between hitting and standing in this situation is among the closest decisions in all
of gambling -- but hitting is still better.
An on-air debate ensued. Almost everyone within microphone range endorsed standing on the 16. Stern, to his
credit, argued for a hit. In the end Hard Luck stood and Hard Rock flipped over a 10 in the hole for a pat 20 and its
second $100K win in as many years. Would the correct play have saved the day? Not this time -- the next card was a
6. Hard Luck, true to its name, was doomed from the deal.
All four years, predictably, sex was the prevalent theme of the event, but gambling was a close second. Every
radio segment broadcast from Las Vegas seemed to touch on blackjack in one way or another. The on-air personalities
played. Special guests played. And the audience played ... for all kinds of things. They played for dates with porn stars,
for boob jobs, and, of course, for the cash.
Stern played, too. Not on the air, but in between shows. Each morning, he discussed his forays to the tables,
during which the listening audience got significant insight into his gambling modus operandi. Is Howard Stern a
skilled gambler? Not even close. In fact, he could be the poster boy for gambling misinformation. He talked about
streaks and luck and a progressive system he'd bought into. None has any bearing on gambling results, but it's not
uncommon for otherwise intelligent people to believe that they do. Why? Because they're easy, and no one wants
gambling to be hard.
Though he doesn't appear to be much of a casino gambler, Stern and his morning radio crew continually bet
on different propositions. In one bit from early 2003 known as "Stump the Stripper," they wagered on whether a girl
would know the answers to simple questions, such as, "What's the temperature at which water freezes?"; "how many
people are in a quartet?"; "what's twenty percent of two hundred?"; and "what's income-tax deadline day?" Stern, who
gave one particular stripper some credit for intelligence, bet that she'd know most of the answers -- and cleaned up
against sidekick Robin Quivers, who went on tilt and wound up losing more than $2,000.
During his second appearance at the Hard Rock in 2002, Stern reportedly had a party in his room with all the
girls from Club Paradise (the jiggle joint across the street); they all said he was mellow. He was also cool about hosting
a meet-and-greet event for invited guests. Cyr was blown away by how many of his top players wanted to get into that
party. Whatever Stern's charging the Hard Rock to appear, even if it's a million, he should double it -- for all the big play
that follows in his wake.
